control is an illusion

Control is an illusion, right? It’s confusing for me because there are things I’m doing to face this crises. A grocery run, exercising and staying home are steps to control my well-being but are these things holding my life together? I think not. 

A few years ago, that phrase came up while meeting with a mentor. He said, “John, control is an illusion. You could pull out of my parking lot and get hit by a beer truck. Our lives are not held in our hands.” In my head I absolutely agreed with Fil.

“Control is an illusion” was my takeaway from our time together and was my primary thought as I jumped in my car to hustle onward.

Fil’s office is behind Battleground Avenue here in Greensboro, a particularly busy part of town. The traffic that particular day was terrible. As I drove down the side road toward Battleground for whatever reason I looked down at my dash. I looked back up all I could see was the side of an 18-wheeler.

It appeared that the driver popped his clutch and lunged out in front of my car. I swerved and luckily missed the truck.  With a beating heart, I quickly looked in my rear view mirror and noticed the logo on the side of the truck. 

Yes friends, it was Anheuser-Busch beer truck. 

In that moment, I heard Fil’s words with great impact: “control is an illusion!” My heart was struck as I crashed into this God-given reality. 

That phrase became more than a thought I agreed with but became a reality to live with. It moved from my head down to my heart.  

During this crazy, Coronavirus time I’m relearning how to walk in the reality that Christ holds my life. His hands are not sweaty, shaky or full. They faithfully stretch to far places and touch hiding places of my heart.

James Bryan Smith said, “We live in the strong and unshakeable Kingdom of God. The Kingdom is not in trouble and neither are we.”  

I’ve picked back up some daily, practical ways that help me lean into this kingdom way of life. Here’s a few and if one grabs your attention let me know.

1- Take time to remember stories of when you were out-of- control and how God met you. Remembering is something we often don’t have time to do. Recall a story of God working in difficulty and speak it out to a family member or friend. Personally, I am surprised how I phrase words of remembering. Sometimes you need to take notes on things you say. It’s a practical way to re-engage the ever-present God. 

2- Routinely pay attention to what is happening in your heart. Record your struggle with control and dealing with the current circumstances. Journal your grief during this historic season of our country. Someone years down the road your written words may benefit a friend or family member.

3- Try the One Minute Pause. John Eldridge has a new book called Get Your Life Back and he couples the ideas of pausing for a few minutes and prayerfully giving everything over to Jesus. He created an App (https://www.pauseapp.com) that makes this practice super easy. I really like the wording of the simple prayer: “Jesus I give everyone and everything to you. I give everyone and everything to you God.” 

4- Limit the news intake. News can feed this illusion that I am in charge because fear drives control.  It’s one thing to be informed and another to be in fear.

5- Fred Rogers encouraged parents and children to look for the helpers when you watch the news. If you have health care workers in your life, send them a text. Make it a habit to buy stamps at the grocery and mail notes to people on the front lines. Have your kids make a thank you sign for the garbage collectors. When we aren’t “on point” to hold our lives there’s a freedom to look beyond ourselves.

There are things in your spiritual life that you can control. You can control how you respond to circumstances. You can control how you set your mind today.  You can allow time for God’s words to you to sink from your head to your heart.  

I end with this short verse from Colossians 1:17. I hope it strikes your heart and becomes a reality in your everyday life. “Christ is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” 

John